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How do you just start a story?

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“I am an aspiring novelist. Right now, I keep a journal of my day to day thoughts and inspirational quotes. I’ve always said that I wanted to write novels one day, but I don’t know where you begin. How do you just start a story?” –Rico

I think keeping a journal is an excellent start.  Keeping a journal gives you practice for descriptive narrative.  It helps you refine your abilities to observe and recall events.  Be sure to push yourself further and practice recalling everything that happened to you in a day:  where you went, what you wore, how you felt, what you ate, what it tasted like, how places smell, what things reminded you of other things.  Pick one day out of the week to make your ultra-descriptive journal entry so that you don’t overwhelm yourself every day that you write.

But obviously, keeping a journal alone won’t result in a novel.  Novels will have dialogue, and I will get to dialogue writing in a future entry.  What I will focus on today is how to just start writing.

In your daily adventures, observe people and situations that you find interesting.  Then ask a “what if” question based on your writing interests.  For my upcoming novel Birth of a Dark Nation, I merely asked myself “What if vampires came from Africa rather than Europe?”  From that single question came many others:

  • How did African vampires get to America?
  • Are there white vampires?
  • If so, how did they come to be?
  • What makes my vampires different from traditional vampires, aside from race?

And so on and so forth.  Now, you might not be writing in a paranormal genre, in which case the questions might be simpler.  In the case of Covenant, the central question was “What would happen if the star basketball player was dating a fraternity man?”  And from those questions arose more, some from me, some from people who read the rough draft:

  • What if one of them was already in a relationship?
  • Who is the girl?
  • What if there’s an ex?
  • Who is he?
  • Does the public know?
  • What are their parents like?

Your questions should start you down a path of either/or scenarios, sort of like the “Find your own adventure” books from back in the day.  You might already know how you want the novel to turn out, and that’s fine.  The toughest part may be getting to the end.

Take your time and make an outline of the story.  Be patient with yourself.  Give yourself time to figure out the beginning, middle, and end.  but never forget your central question.  Answer it in your novel, or at least write the kind of novel in which everyone who reads it walks away pondering the same question:  “What if…?”

Number One in African American Gay Romance. And Two. And Five.

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Great news, readers!

As 2012 comes to a close, I am really humbled that so many of you voted for me to appear on the GoodReads African American Gay Romance list!  Epiphany has been voted number one, Covenant has been voted number two, and Lazarus has been voted number five!

12-31-12-Listopia

Listopia uses a formula that somehow multiplies number of votes with rankings and reviews….hell, I don’t know how it works, but I am glad that it puts the power in the hands of the readers!  Self-published authors rarely get that courtesy.

By the end of the day, this list could change and another worthy author could be on top.  But I’m just glad that right now, at this moment in time, my readers thought enough of my work – and of the epic love story of Adrian Collins and Isaiah Aiken – to vote for it and share it with the world.  Thank you for giving my books this shine.  Adrian and Isaiah appreciate it!

To vote for your favorite black gay romance novels, click here!

Lazarus: Fantasy Casting

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EVERY novelist…I mean, evvvvvery novelist does one of two things when writing their novels:

  1. Create a playlist which is the soundtrack to the novel.
  2. Imagine which actors would play their characters in the inevitable movie (or television) version.

I am no exception.  So let’s hop to it.

Tyler James Williams as Adrian.  When I finished the first draft of Lazarus, Tyler was ten years old.  When it was released, he was 13 and had the lead role in Everybody Hates Chris.  I’ve selected Tyler because I’ve always imagined Adrian to be a slim, brown-skinned dude who was handsome, but not necessarily confident.  Tyler has a lot of great, strong moments as an actor and I think he could pull off the nuances of Adrian’s character.

Honorable mention: Degrassi’s Jahmil French, who would also do very well as Peter, the Ace of the line.

The search for the perfect Nina is a lot harder.  I like a lot of young, black actresses for this role, but one that comes to mind also comes from the Degrassi family:

Shanice Banton as Nina.  The “Gal Friday” of the novel, Nina is sassy, sexy, and confident – the antithesis of the “awkward black girl” movement that seems to be afoot right now.  Shanice Banton (with a kinky hairstyle for the role) would bring everything to Nina.  If you haven’t caught her as the bitchy girl with a conscience on Degrassi, please do so!  I’m looking forward to seeing a lot from her in the future.

How about Evan Ross as Savion?  Granted, I am basing this casting decision purely on looks.  If Evan can pull of “scruffy artist” then I think we might have a winner.

Royce White as Isaiah?  I’m going to have to meditate on this one for a while, because not only should the “actor” look like how he’s described in the book, he’d also have to match Adrian Collins.  I’m not sure Royce and Tyler would look right… but then again, it’s possible that Adrian and Isaiah don’t look right together, either.

Viola Davis as Mrs. Collins and *spoiler alert*

Kristoff St. John as Mr. Collins.

Now, one of the quirks about the novels is that Adrian is supposed to be the spitting image of Mr. Collins.  I could get over that if Kristoff was the daddy for this movie/show.  I could so get into this family dynamic: the cold, aloof, stern mother raising the college kid by herself while the relatively wealthy businessman pops in and out of Adrian’s life.  I want the reader to feel for both parents in different ways and I think each actor could pull it off.  You want to hate Mrs. Collins because she’s so emotionally distant from Adrian, but you love her because you see and feel her vulnerability and her anger.  And Mr. Collins?  I want an actor that can make you forget that he’s left his son for the past ten years.  I want you to see what Mrs. Collins saw in him and why Adrian is able to ultimately forgive him.  I’ve seen Kristoff handle some meaty material on The Young and The Restless, and I think he can pull all these elements together.

There are a ton of other, smaller roles in all three novels that I’d love to see properly cast, like Aubrey Graham as Mohammed.  But those will be for another day.  Hope you had fun fantasy casting with me!

Hebrews 13

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  1. Let brotherly love continue.
  2. Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.

(From the 13th Chapter of Hebrews, English Standard Version)

In Lazarus, which is my first novel, I discuss in detail the pledge process of the Sigma Chapter of Beta Chi Phi Fraternity, Inc.  Reactions to the fact that it is so detailed have been mixed.  Some people (who are Greek) feel that it is too detailed and I have somehow defiled the sanctity of “The Process.”  Others (who are not Greek) are simply uninterested in the minutia of a pledge process and wish I would focus on the characters more.  Then there is the majority, who get so engrossed in the details of the process that it is entirely fulfilling to them.

Certain mysteries of Greekdom remain by the end of Lazarus though, not the least of which are what sort of ritual secrets the pledges learn when they cross.

In Covenant, we learn one of those secrets: the motto.  Taken from the first verse of Hebrews 13, the secret motto is “Let brotherly love continue.”  It is spoken as part of the opening ceremonies of the chapter meeting.  It is also the backbone of the philosophy of the entire organization, which is fleshed out further in Epiphany.

To the Betas, letting brotherly love continue is their prime directive.  No matter what, the brotherhood must go on.  It is this directive that Craig follows which turns him from virulent homophobe to merely an aggressive prophyte helping Adrian prove his mettle.  We know that in reality, Craig is still a homophobe, but his belief in the motto of the fraternity allows him to at least silence his rage and begin the process of accepting Adrian as he is, where he is.

The motto is exemplified more organically by the majority of Adrian’s line brothers, who in their own way and apart from Adrian, learn to accept his sexuality in spite of what popular opinion may be.  Further, on either side of the spectrum, there are members of the line who do far less than accept Adrian and those who do far more – those who never doubted their brotherly love for Adrian for a second.

What is addressed in Epiphany is the second verse of the chapter.  Regarding hospitality, it admonishes the reader (and in this case, Betas) to show hospitality even to strangers, lest their own divinity be ignored.  A literal reading could take this passage to mean that actual angels could be ascertaining your worth by a test of your hospitality.  A more liberal reading, perhaps that of a Quaker, might suggest that if God is in all of us, then we are disrespecting God by being inhospitable to strangers.

In Epiphany, as an Amazon reviewer states, Adrian finds an element of his own strength through his interactions with other Beta chapters.  It could be argued that these brothers, who for all intents and purposes, are able to recognize the God within each other without having to know each other directly.  They gain camaraderie as well as strength; social ties as well as benefits from these relationships.  They are trained to be hospitable to one another, which further facilitates letting brotherly love continue.

It’s been quite a while since I’ve performed an exegesis – hope my Theology professors are proud!

While Beta Chi Phi is obviously a fictitious fraternity, I wanted to inject what I felt were the important parts of Greekdom into the mythology of this organization.  Brotherly love (and sisterly devotion) should always transcend the bad times, if possible, of course.  I don’t mean merely glossing over the bad times or not addressing drama as it occurs – I mean that the type of people who join an organization should be the ones who have the capacity to transcend.  Even though, as I said above, Craig might not actually be cured of his homophobia, at least he understands that there is decorum which he must adhere to now that Adrian is his brother.  I was not always afforded those same courtesies when my brotherhood learned that I was openly gay.  I was indeed accosted and literally surrounded by members of another chapter for that very reason.  And there was the hate mail I received through my previous website – a reason that I will not allow comments on my diary to this day.

But I’m not a victim, so don’t worry about all that.  There will always be those people for whom brotherly love cannot transcend their own prejudices.  I blame the prophytes.  And in the absence of prophytes, I blame the parents.

Regarding hospitality, I am troubled by those Greeks who do not perform their due diligence at accommodating fellow members of organizations.  Yes, yes, I am that same guy who frequently tells people “I joined Alpha Phi Alpha, not the NPHC.”  But I mean it for different reasons.

When I say we should accommodate our fellow Greeks, I mean that if there is a Sigma that I can consider for an internship, I will consider him.  I like interns.  They don’t have to all be Alphas.

If I see a Greek on the street – any Greek – I am going to acknowledge them, even if they are outside of my council, or even a member of a so-called “white” fraternity or sorority.

If a friend has invited me to a crossing party for their special, I am going to attend if I can or send a greeting or a card if I can’t.

Just be hospitable.  Be nice.  Do for others.  It’s not hard.

I went to a city for a work conference and met with as many friends and acquaintances as I could.  One was a member of another fraternity.  We had other things in common, but I tried my hardest to meet up with this dude and make sure he understood the opportunities for service and professional advancement that I was in town for.  Never met up with him.  Just didn’t happen.  Didn’t ever hear a good explanation, really.

And on the other hand, I met up with another person – an AKA – and even though a partnership never happened between our two jobs, the effort was made to meet up, to be hospitable, to “build” as the hip-hop community might say.  This is what being Greek is all about.  Taking a large network and using it to your benefit – not just because that’s what it’s there for, but because it also ought to be fun.

Obviously, “building” isn’t just for Greeks.  The same theory of being hospitable to “strangers” can and should be utilized across all of your large networks.  If you are a Georgetown alum, you already have commonalities with Duke and Syracuse alums.  Bitter rivalries are for basketball.  Put down the sword and get to work.  Same for Howard and Hampton.  We can do big things here.

Whether you believe in angels or not, you must certainly believe in good karma or paying it forward.  As Hebrews admonishes us to do, make these sacrifices.  Whether you believe they are sacrifices to God or to some personal gain, it can’t hurt to just be hospitable.  I think indifference is a good gateway to spite and I’m definitely trying to have less of that in 2012.

Remembering Crushes Past with Hot Mama

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I have no children.

Ironically, there are many women in my life who have claimed me as their baby’s father.  Usually, these kids don’t really exist. As in, it’s a joke.  Sometimes there will be a kid who looks like me, so the joke is I’m their real daddy.  And other times, people just accuse me of being a closet heterosexual with kids stashed away somewhere.

One of my baby’s mamas (We’ll call her Hot Mama) came over to visit today for an alumni reunion meeting.  We looked through old yearbooks as a guide to figure out who would be likely to come to our reunion.  It was fun.  I pointed out a few guys I had crushed on and wondered where they were.  Much like the main character in Lazarus, Adrian Collins, I have had many crushes on many boys over a long period of time. It is only recently that I haven’t had a serious one.

Hot Mama asked me if I had been dating anyone.  The answer was no.  I guess you could say that I had a date earlier in the winter when I entertained a guy who was otherwise occupied in the intricacies of his own life.  It didn’t go anywhere, nor should it have.  And before then, it had been a year since I’d gone on a date.

I don’t feel single.  I generally feel fulfilled and accomplished and I don’t have a desire for children.  Yes, I get lonely and some nights it’s worse than others.  But it is not a chronic loneliness.  Recurring.  Acute.  But not chronic.

For some reason, I got out one of my Georgetown yearbooks and flipped it open to the [sport redacted] page.  I paused.  No, it wasn’t a pause.  It was a full stop.  And this wave of euphoria just came over me.  Hot Mama noticed it immediately.

“Well who the hell is that?” she asked.

“This right here…..this is the face that launched three novels.”

I’m of the opinion that most great works of fiction start with the question “What if?”

I won’t describe him here.  I won’t tell you the sport he played.  I won’t tell you anything else, really.

The events of Lazarus and Covenant and Epiphany are completely fictitious.  They really are.  But the people whose faces inspired the characters…the men whose eyebrows and noses and cheekbones…..and their walks and their smells and their smiles….. those guys are real.

Over the years, they became other people.  “Adrian” became Adrian.  He had his own story to tell and he chose me to tell it.  “Savion” became Savion, and he used me to share with you the anguish of being unlucky in love, to be misunderstood as clingy and stubborn when all he wanted was his enchanted love.  And “Isaiah” became Isaiah, passionate, loyal, humble, and flawed.  And he used me as the medium to let you know the depth and breadth of his love for Adrian.

The aesthetic inspirations for these characters have all gone on to other, better things I suppose.  From time to time, I encounter them and feel lucky to have known them then, and grateful to know them now.  I support who they are.  I celebrate who they became.  And I’m thankful for what they gave me, for as a 19 year old Sophomore at Georgetown, my “Savion” and my “Isaiah” were the seeds to my “what ifs.”  Those seeds became a play, first called “Behind Closed Door” then “Discretion” about a fraternity man and a varsity basketball player.  And then my characters said no, tell the whole story, and tell it right.  And I gave birth to Lazarus, and the characters didn’t even look like the seeds anymore.  And then came Covenant and then came Epiphany, and the next thing you know it’s over a decade later and my babies didn’t remotely look, talk, or sound like their inspirations anymore.

My “what ifs” became “what is.”  My crushes became “what was.”

My crushes launched three novels.  Imagine what my loves will launch.

An update for the facebook and twitter-less

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It’s a beautiful morning here in the nation’s capital and unfortunately I am at home, eating oatmeal and trying to nurse myself back to health after an overnight migraine and subsequent upset stomach.  But I figured it would be a good time to pay some attention to my often neglected diary.

My diary (I have rarely called it a blog) used to be the hot shit back in 2004-2007.  To this day, people ask me why I don’t write in it like I used to.  One brother of Alpha recently gave me the kindest, sweetest text message ever, telling me that he had so much respect for me before he crossed because he kept up with my life through my diary.  That respect carried over when we finally met face to face and became friends.  I honestly either never knew he was a “fan” of my diary, or I didn’t understand then the weight that it held for people.

Now, I get it.

When you’re in a fraternity like Alpha, you will encounter dozens, if not hundreds of men, old and young, who join because of the status they wrongly predict it will bring them.  Yes, being an Alpha carries weight in certain circles.  In DC, I think being a member of an NPHC fraternity or sorority means something to most people of color here, and even among some white people.

But the weight means nothing if you have expectations of it.  It’s sort of like being a Georgetown graduate.  I might say, for shits and giggles, that I went to Georgetown *hair flip* and anything else is beneath me.  But that’s just for fun.  I actually don’t expect any perks from being a Georgetown grad and I am surprised when I get them, be it a closer look in the hiring process for a job, or being able to connect with alumni from our peer institutions more quickly, like Syracuse, Duke, Stanford, and Johns Hopkins.

Being an Alpha, to me, was never about the heft of the honor.  It was about the brotherhood.  In other words:

  • Membership in Alpha is a responsibility: paying dues, showing up for meetings and programs, doing service, going to conventions.
  • Brotherhood in Alpha is a courtesy:  giving someone the benefit of the doubt, a second look, a helping hand.
  • Friendship in Alpha is another matter entirely.

On tomorrow, I will have been an Alpha for nine years.  For most of those years, I have been a member.  I do not feel badly about the years in which I was inactive.  For all of those years, I have been a brother.  And to perhaps less than twenty, or even less than ten Alphas, I have been a friend.

When you’ve been through the things I’ve been through as a member, you tend to keep the circle small.  For the long-term readers of my original site, you will recall the things that fellow members have done to me which were disrespectful and repugnant.  My friends know even more.  But somehow, I always made time to be there for an aspirant or two, as a sponsor, special, or just a friend.  And I’ve been lucky to meet more recent initiates who gravitate toward me when they see me in Alpha-only forums giving some ignorant, homophobic Alpha a good dressing down.  (A read, if you will.)  I suppose they see in me an “I don’t give a fuck” attitude that they find entertaining, or maybe courageous.  I don’t know.  Maybe I will ask.

I know what Alpha says about being active.  I know what I was taught about being active.  And I understand that my presence is missed when I am not around, at least to some, sometimes.  But ultimately, for me, being an Alpha meant being somebody’s brother for the first time – to extend certain courtesies to strangers because I knew we shared the same values, and to perhaps have those courtesies be extended to me.

Over the years, I have made it my point to share news about Black fraternal organizations, positive and negative.  I’ve discussed hazing in particular an awful lot – it made its way into my novels and unfortunately has not subsided over the years.  I’m hoping that one day, Lazarus can be looked at as a relic from the past and our children can read it – with horror – and wonder why generations of black men and women subjected ourselves to the brutality.

But perhaps more importantly, I have also posted about various allegations of wrong-doing on the part of the leadership of African American fraternities and sororities.  Indeed, since the publication of Lazarus, there have been three scandals involving NPHC leaders that I’ve discussed.  I care because I have strong convictions regarding the black fraternal commitment to the public and how we earn the public’s trust.  I will not be shying away from discussing any public allegations which may befall even my own beloved APhiA.

Don’t get me wrong.  I am not Mo’Kelly.  I will not be doing any investigative journalism or original reporting.  But I do believe I need to be fair as a diarist and pundit of fraternal matters.  What’s good for the sorors is good for the frat, even my own.

I will be committed to a tone which is temperate.  I will approach any matter discussed with dignity and in the interest of the public’s trust and faith in our organizations.  We are here to serve them, not each other or ourselves.  I understand the responsibility of my diary: to be authentic in my truth and honest in my opinions.  These truths and opinions were not a deterrent for those interested in Alpha and not distasteful to those who support Alpha.  It has been proven that the brotherhood needs strong dissension – which in and of itself is part of self-examination.  And I do believe the public appreciates us more when we show we’re real people with diverse ideas and strong opinions about ethics and values.

On a final note, my third novel, Epiphany, has a story line which interweaves some of the issues I’ve mentioned above.  There is a chapter advisor whom the boys are not sure has their best interests at heart.  But you’ve got to read it yourself to see in which direction the story is taken.  I think you’ll enjoy it, aside from the great main plot.

So thanks for your support over the years!  Don’t forget that my books are all available through my website, oldgoldsoul.com (which you’re probably reading this entry on), Amazon, and pretty much any bookstore on special order.  My novels are also available on Kindle readers and through Kindle apps – which means you can read my novels on your Kindle, any computer, and even your cell phone.

Have a great day…see y’all around!